Freedom: To leave or to stay?

Sometimes, freedom means not to go but to stay. We find ourselves thinking: How nice it would be if I could grow up and just spread my wings and fly without having someone behind me telling me what to do or where I should be. However, who is to say to spread our wings and fly away is actually the best for us? Leaving a place where you belong, where your existence is practically carved into every corner of the area, is it really freedom, or is it merely a desperate belief on our behalf? Staying in that place might make one feel restricted, but it's where our territory is, where we feel most at ease at because we already know every nook and cranny of the place. Freedom is not found, it is gained. Therefore, freedom can exist if we stay, because the knowledge of the area and how much confidence we have in that place allows us to actually have true freedom of mind without being plagued by the worries of a new neighbourhood, new community rules and the unknown security levels if a strange place.

First sweet success

Ah yes, finally. Sweet success to me. I managed to stick through one book and completed it. I have a few odds about the title, but no harm in taking my time. If anyone helps me find an agent I'll be over the moon.

Dream

Guess what? I've finally decided on my writing name! Yeah, I was too lazy to think of anything else, but it's HARD trying to find one that would suit me. Something that doesn't sound too child-like, something not that simple. In the end, I've decided to stick to CB Dream. It's sort of like me, if you know what I mean. Ever since I've discovered my passion for writing, that has become my goal, my dream. My precious CHARLOTTE BRONTE DREAM. I want to be like her. Smart and successful. Not that I want to die at 38 years old, but the other part, the career part. Jane Austen too, but CB sounds better than JA. And I liked Charlotte way before I read Jane Austen.

So, um...that's it. Oh, and my new plans. I'm writing a trilogy now. Not very detailed yet, but I've got the first book all sorted out - nearly.

Random Postie

Random post time...let's see...my story is really slow!!!
I'm only at stinking chapter 4 page 1 paragraph 5!!!!

The content so far:
Chapter 1 ~ The Begining
Chapter 2 ~ A Sister's Secret
Chapter 3 ~ From Fitzwilliam to Bexford
Chapter 4 ~ Living Stars

I think I'll write in my non de plume from now on....it's way too cheesey to do so in my real name

Depressed

I'm entering a depressed mode...nothing I do seemed to work out right! Writing now holds another feeling to it - relieving the inner thoughts in one's heart.

New Story

Begining a new story. The plot is pretty much laid out and I already know what I want to make happen in it, so the only thing left is actually deciding on the names of the characters and writing the actual story. I think I'll do a proper one this time but goodness knows how much this spirit can last. I'll post my main character here for now.

JANE INGRAM
- is around 17 years old when the story begins
- likes admiring beautiful flowers...especially those in Rainbow Valley
- kind and friendly though a bit of a worrywart when it comes to her sister
- brunette with matching almond shaped eyes
- enjoys walks down Hestia Lane and places like it

Setting
- around the 19th century
- in a fictional village (I haven't decided on a name yet)

Plot
- centers around Jane and her life for oh I don't know, the next seven years? It depends on how my see-saw brain decides

Story 1

The Final Night

The moon was shining extremely bright that night. She could see its light reflecting off the surface of the pond. The stars too twinkled and in her opinion, she had never seen such a lovely night before in her life.

She pulled the shawl around her frail shoulders. The temperature that night was warm, yet her body shivered when a light breeze blew past. She sat down on the porch, staring out towards the brightly lit home she couldn’t see.

Light footsteps informed her of her lover’s approach. Soon enough, Ronald appeared beside her and sat down as well. Ronald had always been a wonderful man and he never failed to make her happy, no matter how dire their situation was.

Ronald saw a pale girl with bright grey eyes-too bright. Her skin was stretched tight against her cheekbones, her dress was too large for her and her hair was loose which was spilled on her back. It hurt Ronald to see the girl he loved in so much pain yet there was nothing he could do to help her. All he could do was hope for the end to come swiftly and painlessly.

Pandora was the daughter of a rich family who had had the best in her life. Her mother had been proud of Pandora, whom she named after the figure in Greek mythology. Her parents wanted her to marry someone rich and of noble lineage. Pandora however had no intention of getting married at sixteen, so she persuaded her parents to let her fool around for another couple of years. Her elder sister, who wasn’t half as pretty as Pandora, was desperate to find a husband, so their parents let her get engaged to the man Pandora refused to marry. But tragedy struck before the two families could even start celebrating their union. Pandora’s sister had caught pneumonia and was unfortunately a lost cause.

Pandora’s family had always wanted a connection with the other house, so although they know Pandora was unwilling, they forced her into the engagement. Angry and disappointed by her family’s decision, Pandora made up her mind to run away from home. It was then Ronald, who had been meeting Pandora secretly for quite a while, made her a marriage proposal. The young lovers took things in their own hands and eloped, leaving only a letter bearing the lady’s apology and farewell to her family.

They were happy living in the small ranch Ronald’s uncle had left for him. Pandora wanted to return home, to tell her family that she was happy and satisfied with her life and ask for their forgiveness. They planned to do so when Pandora fell ill. The doctor diagnosed her with leukemia and that she will die in a few months time. Ronald wanted to go and beg her family to save her but Pandora decided to end her own life, saying that this was her punishment for being such an ungrateful wretch.

“Ronald, don’t you think the night is wonderful?” asked Pandora in a soft voice.

“Yes,” answered Ronald. “But it is more wonderful when I see it with you. But Dora, shouldn’t you be inside? You might get cold.”

Pandora shook her head slightly. Every single movement she made seemed to require a great effort.

“I’d like to stay out here,” replied Pandora. “Say, Ronald. Do you think it will be eternal darkness on the other side?”

It scared Ronald to hear Pandora talk about death. They have been avoiding that particular subject and Pandora herself refused to acknowledge her own illness. She went about doing the usual chores until she was too weak to go on anymore.

“I don’t think so, Dora,” said Ronald quietly. He didn’t want to think of Pandora being in a dark place all alone.

“Neither do I,” replied Pandora. “I think the other side will be bright and lovely. Or else, why would these stars shine so brightly, as if to tell me to join them up there. I might even meet my dear sister. I do adore her so. Her death was a great shock for me.”

Pandora continued to babble on about her family. Tears slid down her cheeks and her voice got husky. She sobbed a while before she spoke again.

“Why, I can see my lovely sister! She’s beckoning to me. She looks so happy and peaceful. Oh how I missed her! Wait for me, my sister…”

Ronald gripped her hand tightly in his as her voice faded. He kept looking at the sky until her voice could no longer be heard. When he turned to look at her, she wore a peaceful smile and looked very much at ease. The hand he held started to grow cold and he realised that he could no longer hear her breathing. It was then he knew Pandora will never return.

Written by: Ng Mei Kei

Class: 4 SC Beta